Saturday, July 5, 2008

flowback: the salmon of knowledge

This is a post from last year. that is really relevant today.

Sunday June, 17 2007

Today I woke up. Today I am eating cereal. I woke up with the intention of writing something here most immediately. I had some interesting dreams.
How to tell?
How to tell anything really.
Had an interesting day yesterday. That entered my dreams in a weird way.
Yesterday a man came up to the booth and we started to talk to him. He told us about his dreams.
He said his dream was to go to the motherland and have lots of children. To have lots of wives so he could have lots of children. It seemed like he was for real and he seemed pretty genuine about that. about having lots of children. When in Senegal the father of my homestay family had another family somewhere else in Dakar. He would leave for a couple of days and be back later.
I could go into the politics of and my feelings about that but its not in me today.
Last night I dreamt I was in a old mansion house. And Mary J. Blige was there for a minute and she had just had a baby and I was like how did Mary J. have a baby and me not know about it. But anyway the house was spirited of the old people that had been there before. And in an upper case room all this old money, these old coins, gold and silver of all kinds, old as in coins of the past, like dubloons, etc. were coagulating in the room above the room I was staying, in the corner against the wall by the door .. Mary J. Blige was staying in that room and there was some other lady as well, but anyway. it was like a water leak and all these various old coins were leaking down to the room I was staying in like dripping. There was also a man 40 something balding man who looked like a man i met recently.. he was like a curator.. or the concierge of this place. He knew the history. Some way or another I am chilling with this white girl with dark brown hair. And some how or another the coins are connected to this black girl who used to live in this house way back when and another white girl as well who lived there about the same age. Like in the early 1800s or 1700s. And the reasons why are not known but somehow in the lore of this place the records get switched up and their names and purposes are switched. Their names are Emily and Sarah. And the black girl was a teacher professor in this house mansion now museum but .. skip ahead.. so somehow me and this other girl are running.. and somehow we call out one of the girl's names when we are running and she comes crackling out of the back time though she has always been there waiting.. somehow she is still there though so much time has passed,.. their names having been switched and after her name is called in my mind's eye I see her coming in the distance.. crackling into from a dot in a storm cloud.. she is a dot.. rounding off a dark cloud.. in the far off distance.. way way away i can see her coming as i am running on the ground.. she on a broomstick in the air.. I don't know what she wants.. .or why we called her.
Some very interesting things are happening in real life time.
Today is father's day. Happy Father's Day all.
I am thinking about my father.
I am thinking about my grandfather who has passed away and my grandmother. It is so interesting. They lived in greenville, ms and the house is still there and its been empty and some people broke into it, into its sleeping state. It was a vault.. everything was precisely as my grandparent's had left it when they died. And some people broke in.. and brought themselves with them into the space.. and some I won't speak about . except to say who knew? and who why?
... and we are in Memphis..
so .. I guess what I am saying is... if and when you have memories of a place.. and the people who have lived in it.. that are loved by you and who you loved... and what a place is.. and what a thing is.. and what people are.. people who move and pass and die.. people who move and pass and die and linger in your imagination and your being.. and who are you to some degree.. what is that essentialness.. Most of my memories of my grandparents took place in that house.. so..
what is a house..
and what is memory..
and what is time
and what is change..
and what is essentialness
and thats connected to my dreams,
my past dreams and my future dreams
Honestly many things don't seem quite real these days.. particularly today
.. so here's to the things I like and how and when I like them through time.. here are some of the things I am dreaming

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